I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
