You can't special order awesome
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
