Porn is love you can see.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
