Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
