You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
