My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Enjoy the penises
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
