if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
4 words: hood of his car
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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