She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
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