i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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