i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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