Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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