STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
And then my night got REAL pukey
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
