"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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