Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
