i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
