yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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