We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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