i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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