I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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