My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Quick, to the slutcave!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize