I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
