I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
