I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize