Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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