i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
