worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
