Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
