no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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