why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
