shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
