My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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