Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
