Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Randomize
