Little spoons don't ask big questions
you win again, gameday.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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