I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
soo... how was my night?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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