Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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