I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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