Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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