awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Randomize
