I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
