after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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