You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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