She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Who did Billy Mays play for?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
