Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
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