Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
