Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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