Where are you?
In a non slutty way
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
