I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
