And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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