That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
