just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
